Hope floats. Isn't that what they say? I guess it means that amidst all of the other 'stuff' in life, hope rises above and if we hold on to it, helps us to keep our head above water when things get tough.
As a parent, the most difficult thing to endure is watching your child hurt in any way. All children face obstacles, rejection and disappointment in life and all children face physical and emotional pain. I think being a special needs mom is like "motherhood on steroids" because we experience this pain with our children on a more regular basis. There are more roadblocks and setbacks. Many times we take one step forward just to take three giant leaps backwards. You get knocked down, but you get back up and keep pushing forward.
So what keeps us moving ahead when it would be so much easier to just sit down and cry? It's hope. We have to believe that tomorrow is going to be better in order to get through today.
I find myself saying "next year" a lot when talking about things we haven't been able to do as a family with Ella Grace:
"Next year we will be able to go there..."
Or "Next year we can bring her here..."
I also say it (although mostly to myself) about her development:
"Maybe next year she will sit, crawl, etc."
And I say it about her health:
"Next year she won't be in the hospital as much..."
What I'm saying is that I'm hopeful of these things for our future. Of course there are no guarantees in how things will work out, but without hope we're just left swimming in that sea of 'other stuff' and that's not where I want to be.
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